Stay or Go? 6 Tips to Decide

We make thousands of decisions every day, from what to eat for breakfast to what to wear. But some decisions are far more complex and difficult to make.

We all face situations where we're not sure which outcome is better for us, or whether we should follow our emotions or our logic. Here are 6 tips to help you with those tough decisions:

Tip 1: Would you expect others to do the same?

Loyalty, or an excessive sense of duty, can sometimes push us to do things we don't want to do. For example, you might hate your boss and even your coworkers, thinking they do nothing but spread poison. But do you suppress those feelings and keep postponing leaving just because having that final conversation seems too hard? Or maybe your roommate is driving you crazy, but you keep everything inside just to avoid burning bridges? In such situations, we suggest showing empathy and tolerance to others up to a point. Don't allow others to do things to you that you wouldn't ask of them! :)

Tip 2: Don't rush big decisions; give your emotions enough time.

We're not saying don't suddenly decide to get a tattoo while drunk—everyone has moments of losing control. But when it's a big decision like buying a house, you should pause. When making such big decisions, make sure you're not angry, crazy, or depressed. Otherwise, decisions made when your thoughts and emotions are unclear can lead you astray and end in regret.

Tip 3: Make your pros and cons list as long as possible!

When making a decision, a pros and cons list can help you see the events and outcomes more clearly. But think broadly about the positive and negative aspects, and if necessary, exaggerate so you're prepared for any outcome. This will help you make the right decision.

Tip 4: The more you validate your decision, the better!

When making a decision that will affect your life, think it through thoroughly until you're sure it's logical, convincing, and rational. If needed, consult someone whose opinion you value to confirm the decision is right, and then take action.

Tip 5: Act before you stop being yourself!

When you're passive, others might walk all over you. But if you can't express yourself gently and then become aggressive when your patience runs out, you might end up in the wrong. So express your thoughts and needs kindly, without being passive or too aggressive. Be clear when expressing yourself. Of course, there's always a chance that defending yourself falls on deaf ears or nothing changes, but at least knowing you did something for yourself will comfort you.

Tip 6: Focus on the issue without considering the options!

To make a tough decision, sometimes it helps to imagine you have no choice and test the pros and cons of both outcomes. First, act as if there's nothing else in the universe to distract you and focus only on the main issue. Ask yourself what this issue makes you feel. Then imagine the opposite and feel the difference in emotions. Finally, focus on which feeling is better and decide accordingly.

In summary, the future is uncertain for all of us. It's hard to predict what today's steps will bring tomorrow. We can only reason with our own emotions and values. We all sometimes feel that if I go, something will happen, but if I stay, something bigger will. At this point, it's best to think with needs and expectations, considering pros and cons, and take a clear stance. You actually know best—listen to yourself!